Supermarket Sit-Com

Honestly some days you couldn’t dream it up. If what happened today was put to paper for a TV script no one would believe it.

I’m standing in a queue at the supermarket checkout, there’s three people in front of me and the cashier runs out of change. So he leaves the till to fetch some from the office and the man in front of me shouts out, “Hurry up my friend’s outside waiting for me.” The cashier shoots him a glance but doesn’t respond. Upon his return he gives the lady waiting her change and starts to scan the next customer’s shopping.

queue-different-people-grocery-store-crowd-staying-line-lot-vector-89298978

The action is paused again as the apples won’t scan, so the lady offers to fetch some more. She leaves the queue and goes to the fruit section and the man in front of me says, “Where’s she going? I’ll be late.” She returns with a new box of apples and they scan perfectly. The cashier leaves the till to put them aside to be returned later. “Where are you going now?” The man in front says, “I’ve already told you my friend is waiting for me outside.” The apples lady goes to pay with her card and puts in the wrong pin number. This causes more annoyance to the man in front of me and again he’s vocal, making sure everyone in the vicinity knows he’ll be late.

His turn comes and his shopping is scanned, the cashier asks for payment when the man suddenly leaves the queue to go back into the store as he’s forgotten to get ice cream.

Oh the irony.

The rest of us in the line start to snigger. He returns with his ice cream and as it’s scanned he remembers something else he’s forgotten. More sniggering takes place from the now bemused customers behind me. He returns with his forgotten item and as it’s scanned he goes to the exit door and waves to his friend who is pointing to his watch.

The man goes outside to briefly speak with his friend and the automatic doors close behind him. He then waves at the cashier asking him to open the doors. By now the cashier is laughing too and so waves to the man indicating that he must come in through the entrance and walk through the store again.

46-468254_pictures-funny-clip-art-angry-man-shouting-who-ordered-angry-man-cartoon

The man is not a happy man when he arrives at the checkout again and he literally throws his payment at the man behind the counter, who with a devilish glint in his eyes says, “Wait here please while I go and fetch some more change from the office.” I glance over and can see that he ample coinage in the till, needless to say the man in front, tells him to keep the change and stomps off.

Advertisements

Olive Hiatus

It’s 07:00 on Sunday morning and I’m woken by the sound of tractors in the lane, raised voices in the olive groves and the hiss of portable generators. The olive harvest has started.

2015

Last year was a very good year with the bars filled with local farmers boasting about their yield and the excellent quality. Sadly it’s very different this year as many are telling me the amount of olives on the trees is low. With so few to collect every fruit is precious, I look from my kitchen window and Nicola is double-checking there’s no gaps in the nets laid beneath his tree before the olives are raked from its branches.

IMG_0772

Sunday is a good day to harvest, it’s warm and dry and the family continue on with their toil until mid-afternoon. Monday arrives and with it rain. Not gentle rain but heavy, leaden drops and it continues all day and into the night.

Tuesday we are welcomed to sunshine again, however the rain has forced many of the olives from their branches and the lane is strewn with them, they lie on the tarmac, many with their precious oil crushed from them by passing vehicles. Nicola tells we need two or three days of good weather as the ground needs to dry out before he can continue to harvest his crop. With so few to pick he’s hoping we don’t have any more rainy days until his olives are safely at the frantoio..

IMG_0768

We Abruzzese Don’t… (2)

Following on from my previous blog post Gli Abruzzese Non…I visited several butcher shops this week in search of meat that’s not readily available. Readily available meat here includes chicken, pork, rabbit and even horse; but my quest was for petto d’anatra (duck breast) in fact I’d even settle for a whole bird as it’s been such a long time since I’ve eaten any.

The first shop keeper told “l’anatra non viene mangiata, solo le uova.” meaning duck isn’t eaten here only the eggs are. The next butcher shook his head and said something similar, so I decided to try my local butcher who has been quite accommodating to my requests previously.

42269878-1-f

“Do you sell duck?” I asked.

“Eggs?” came the reply.

“No, duck meat, breast or a whole bird?”

This was followed by the similar response of the earlier butchers. So I gave up and was just about to leave the shop when I turned back and asked if they could get me some pigeon.

Behind the counter she looked horrified, “Piccione?” she questioned, “Piccione?” the second time several semi-tones higher. “The Italian’s don’t eat pigeon.”

To which I replied “The English do.” She exhaled loudly, shook her head incredulously and retired into the back room of the shop, leaving me to exit her shop in silence.